I’m a good person but a shitty writer. You’re a shitty person but
a good writer. We’d make a good team. I don’t want to ask you any favors, but if you have time—and from what I saw, you have plenty—I was wondering if you could write a eulogy for Hazel. I’ve got notes and everything, but if you could just make it into acoherent whole or whatever? Or even just tell me what I should say differently.
Here’s the thing about Hazel: Almost everyone is obsessed with leaving a mark upon the world. Bequeathing a legacy. Outlasting death. We all want to be remembered. I do, too. That’s what bothers me most, is being another unremembered casualty in the ancient and inglorious war against disease.
I want to leave a mark.
But Van Houten: The marks humans leave are too often scars. You build a hideous minimall or start a coup or try to become a rock star and you think, “They’ll remember me now,” but (a) they don’t remember you, and (b) all you leave behind are more scars. Your coup becomes a dictatorship. Your minimall becomes a lesion. (Okay, maybe I’m not such a shitty writer. But I can’t pull my ideas together, Van Houten. My thoughts are stars I can’t fathom into constellations.)
We are like a bunch of dogs squirting on fire hydrants. We poison the groundwater with our toxic piss, marking everything MINE in a ridiculous attempt to survive our deaths. I can’t stop pissingon fire hydrants. I know it’s silly and useless—epically useless in my current state—but I am an animal like any other.
Hazel is different. She walks lightly, old man. She walks lightly upon the earth. Hazel knows the truth: We’re as likely to hurt the universe as we are to help it, and we’re not likely to do either.
People will say it’s sad that she leaves a lesser scar, that fewer remember her, that she was loved deeply but not widely. But it’s not sad, Van Houten. It’s triumphant. It’s heroic. Isn’t that the real heroism? Like the doctors say: First, do no harm.
The real heroes anyway aren’t the people doing things; the real heroes are the people NOTICING things, paying attention. The guy who invented the smallpox vaccine didn’t actually invent anything. He just noticed that people with cowpox didn’t get smallpox.
After my PET scan lit up, I snuck into the ICU and saw her while she was unconscious. I just walked in behind a nurse with a badge and I got to sit next to her for like ten minutes before I got caught. I really thought she was going to die before I could tell her that I was going to die, too. It was brutal: the incessant mechanized haranguing of intensive care. She had this dark cancer water dripping out of her chest. Eyes closed. Intubated. But her hand was still her hand, still warm and the nails painted this almost black dark blue and I just held her hand and tried to imagine the world without us and for about one second I was a good enough person to hope she died so she would never know that I was going, too. But then I wanted more time so we could fall in love. I got my wish, I suppose. I left my scar.
A nurse guy came in and told me I had to leave, that visitors weren’t allowed, and I asked if she was doing okay, and the guy said, “She’s still taking on water.” A desert blessing, an ocean curse.
What else? She is so beautiful. You don’t get tired of looking at her. You never worry if she is smarter than you: You know she is. She is funny without ever being mean. I love her. I am so lucky to love her, Van Houten. You don’t get to choose if you get hurt in this world, old man, but you do have some say in who hurts you. I like my choices. I hope she likes hers”
“I do Augustus, I do.
are we going to ignore the fact that this guy
who in one incarnation was raised by a tree
cannot hold the tree pose.
I guess he forgot his roots.
did you just
ladies and gentlement, the hero of time
Anthony Padilla quote from the new smosh video. :3 I thought it was a cute, and inspirational quote so why not? cx
He is a beautiful human being.
My thoughts are stars I cannot fathom into constellations.
how to write poetry like a white person
- the taste of you
- save me
- no wait save yourself
make sure to left align and god forbid touch a capital letter
The real world.
This is from That’s So Raven, where Chelsea and Raven apply to work at the same clothing shop. Chelsea is white; Raven is black. Chelsea gets the job, despite being utterly horrible at it, while Raven, who has a deep interest in fashion and knows how to handle clothes, does not. The girls find this deeply suspicious, so Chelsea wears a hat with a camera on it and questions the employer. The employer admits what she does in the gif above and Chelsea and Raven submit the footage to a news station.
And THAT is why That’s So Raven is the best TV show ever.
That’s not even the only reason why it was the best show ever
isn’t it weird that you can have friends but also have no friends at the same time
even if youre not in the roosterteeth fandom just watch this omg
I visited Amsterdam recently and took a little TFIOS tour! I started at the library where John wrote some of the book and then went on a hunt to find the places in the book and got to meet another Nerdfighter in the process!
When I go to Amsterdam, I’ll be doing this.